Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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