Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize
