ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize