Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
you never un-have a 4some
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Randomize
