just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
