i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
