so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
