You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
