Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
