Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Randomize
