fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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