I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
