Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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