White coat. Heels.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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