i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
