you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
