Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(256): View more from Alabama

Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.

(1-256): View more from Alabama

That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.

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(409): View more from Texas

well he's currently spooning the coffee table

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!

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