Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
