it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
one might say we're banned from that church
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Randomize
