you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
