is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize