everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
