i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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