Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize