According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
