Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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