at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
