So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
