Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
