Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Randomize
