Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
