I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
