he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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