i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
