is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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