I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
