why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
this will be a night to untag.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
