the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
