it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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