Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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