He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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