Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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