So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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