I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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