were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
