I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize