ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
