Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
