I must be too annoying 4 u.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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