this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
