Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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