physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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